I met Tim on a bus
unaware what we'd end up to discuss
countless seats were free
but he specifically sat next to me
so we started talking and we started bonding
and I kept on wondering
why me?
what did he see?
till this day I don't know
but I've learnt to let it go
what remains is the memory
of his pure and drawing energy
I know I can't possibly comprehend
the true extend
of what you're going through
but I see how much it's hurting you
I see the tremendous pain
and I know mine ain't the same
but darling,
you're not the only one
I share your sorrow
the wish for a better tomorrow
the wish to turn back time
when everything was fine
but there's no way back
from this track
and it is a damn hard one
it is a damn dark one
in times when you feel like you're not strong
that you can't go on
remember, I'm walking by your side
until you've reached the light
you're one of the strongest I've ever known
please know that you're not alone
you're not the only one - sam fender
step, step, step
that's what my gramps used to say
it'd get him through the day
this mantra, this talk,
it helped him walk
and it has helped me
to understand and see
that in life you don't skip ahead
you take it step by step
one day I'll go back
one day I'll cut the crap
one day I'll get it done
one day I will be the sun
one day I'll be strong
one day I'll carry on
one day I'll be
whatever
does it actually matter?
I keep telling myself, one day it'll all be alright
just hang in tight
one day it'll all pay off
you just gotta get through this trough
but I don't care about that one day
I'm okay now. that's what I truly wanna say
I just want to be okay
today
I'm not coming home.
I didn't realise when I said those words on the phone
that they would break her heart
knowing we'd be so far apart
- no you can't!
she just didn't understand
I tried to explain
why I wouldn't get on the plane
but she just wouldn't listen
that this was now my mission
I know she was blocked by fear
but I really needed to hear
it's okay my dear
even if it's so so far
you stay where you are
cause you sound very happy
and that's what you're supposed to be.
for a while now I've been feeling out of line
lost the sense to call it mine
lost the strive to take it on
and the joy to tag along
had my struggles pushing through
was scared to death of all the new
but was drowning in the old
because I thought it was my fault
lost the ground beneath my feet
didn't think I could proceed
stopped believing I was strong
I was barely hanging on
occasionally
the memory
of that night we met
pops back into my head
I don't know if you remember what you said to me
but gee
I do
and it made me fall for you
but our timing wasn't right
for love at first sight
and even if we'd tried
faith just wasn't on our side
I asked for more
but it wouldn't give me what I was looking for
I wanted a real chance
and all I got was one. more. dance.
I'm sorry you lost someone close to your heart
that you had to watch them depart
I'm sorry they left you in burning grief
if it's any relief
I believe
they're never fully gone
that their spirit lives on
some might see it in the skies
but I, I see it in your eyes
I see how a part of their soul
made yours become a whole
how no matter what you'll go through
they'll always be within you
within everything you do
that way you'll forever carry their worth
on your beautifully burning earth
ocean, oh ocean
you bring my heart in motion
when there's waves to chase
you'll make it race
when I take that sunset dip
you'll make it trip
and when I think about the lives you rob
you make it stop.
you just got this incredible power
to change someone within the glimpse of an hour
you hand out rides of a lifetime
making people grin and shine
you calm them down
removing any doubting frown
and then you take from others
from lovers, brothers and mothers
I just really hope you'll share your energy
bringing them back to days of reverie
bringing them back to days of lightness
please remind them of life's brightness
I know life's been tough
and to keep going was rough
but look at you
you've made it through
you've made it to this day
and let me just say
I'm proud of you
I'm proud of you still being here
facing your biggest fear
I'm proud of you for trying
and not holding back the crying
I'm proud of you for letting yourself feel
and taking the time to heal
I'm proud of you for being you
and I'm here whenever you feel blue
aka letter to myself
I saw this coming for a while now
but somehow
today's realisation still took me by surprise
when I looked into his stubborn eyes
it made me recognize
that mine had been filling up with tears
cause with his voice in my ears
telling me what I should
I finally understood
that he never would.
see, he views the world differently
and even if I'd wish it wouldn't be
this friendship is just not good for me
so here I am, grieving about the loss of this guy
that made me cry
so many times
wondering if he'll even care about these rhymes
it all just makes me pretty sad
I think I lost a friend I've never had
I lost a friend - FINNEAS
what if I'd actually believed in what I thought I saw
instead of believing in my every flaw
what if I'd listened to my heart
instead of trying to be smart
what if I'd just let go?
but instead I put on this stupid show
trying to convince myself it's for my own protection.
don't show your earnest affection
and you'll be save from rejection.
sounds quite legit right?
but it also keeps me from what might
what might be
if they see
what I don't
if I could just stop believing that they won't
maybe I could find the courage to take that risk
and stop wondering about all the good I might have missed
